A real issue faced by people on the verge of retiring is where to retire in – at home (aging in place), or in a care facility? Why? The euphoria of finally being free from the shackles of work, work, and more work clouds everything out. After years of making a living, now they want to make a lif – a life they never enjoyed before. Like a bird caged too long, they want to “fly” far and wide, to explore, or just sit and do nothing but make the days pass by.
But the hands of time never stop and the ravages of old age exempt no one. What if both conspire against you when you are in the 80s or beyond when you are frosty-old? Will you still stand fast, or make a beeline to the nearest nursing home?
This article intends to give you the real score, so stay put and read on.
What is Aging in Place
Aging in place is the term to describe an elderly person’s choice where to live where he is most comfortable in – in his home. It is the preferred choice of most elderly people because of familiarity. In fact, less than 4% of people 65 and above lives in nursing homes and 90% of Americans approaching retirement age plan to stay put.
Not only out of familiarity, but home is full of memories and memorabilia of the past. It echoes the clanging utensils during dinner time, the laughter of your kids, their toys and crayon scribblings underneath the stairwell wall.
It was once your “love nest,” where the kids were born, grew up, went to school, done with college, got married and started families of their own.
At home, you are surrounded by people you have known for the most part of your life; people who can be counted on to help in case of emergencies.
Aging in place is to be free of the strict rules and regulations found in assisted living facilities.
It is freedom – with a price.
Pros and Cons of Aging in Place
I live in a culture where aging in place is a default option for elderly people like me. It’s the familial bond among Asians that make it possible. Being sent away to a care facility is like a betrayal of an implied parent-children relationship.
But I cannot say the same for those on the other side of the cultural divide. If you are in that situation, be aware of the following pros and cons:
Pros
- Home gives you a sense of peace and serenity. You know who lives immediately around you, play golf with your doctor, and is on a first-name basis with your filling station attendant or the check-out girl of the nearest convenience store.
- Retiring at home avoids the trauma and stress that come with change i.e., being surrounded by people you don’t know, follow routines strict and unfamiliar routines, and eat food revolting to your taste like having a hole in the head
- You get away from the emotionally-draining experience of getting rid of things you don’t need – things that have their own stories to tell like your first fishing gear, your kid’s bike, your wife’s priced casserole set, etc.
Con
- Though less expensive than a nursing home stay, aging in place is not entirely free. There are maintenance costs you have to budget for or spend some effort on;
- It can be lonely at times. Even if you are a very private person, there are times you need to mingle with others and your friends, family members or neighbors may not be there when you need them;
- You are highly vulnerable to health and safety risks.
Aging in Place Tips
I’ve been living alone since my wife died almost eleven years ago. Before that, I did not know how to make the bed the way she did.
As days went by, however, I learned. I learned when to mow the lawn, prune the hedges, clean the house, cook my meals and many other things. When push comes to shove, we learn. And aging in place is a process of constant learning. It’s kind of day school all over again or a boot camp.
Here are a few things I learned over the years. the way. These are good tips when you encounter some bumps along the way.
1. Have a game plan
Consider aging in place as an adventure, the success of which depends on how you planned the trip. Plan for:
- Things to do every day. A daily schedule assures that you have something to do each waking moment of your day. Not only is it a good deterrent against loneliness, but also a good exercise;
- Plan your meals to make sure you won’t skip your dietary needs and your ref full of foodstuffs that can keep you strong and healthy;
- Make sure your finances are in order, your payables are current, your will is in order and your executor knows fully well what to do should the need arise;
- Draw a regular schedule of going out with friends or family members. If you lack both, go out still. Sitting in a coffee shop, a park or mall and watch people go by make you feel “connected;”
- Keep within easy reach the telephone numbers of your doctor, ambulance service, the police, your nearest neighbor or kin;
- If your finances allow it, plan for regular vacations or long drives. Getting away from the regular environment of your home is rejuvenating both for body and soul;
2. Develop a good money attitude
A good money attitude is essential to help you outlive your retirement funds. While your needs may be a lot less now compared than before, but expenses never stop. They just take on another form, like spending more on nutritious foods and medicines. And if you are not careful with your funds, it is possible that it will run out on you.
3. Be tough
Aging in place is not for sissies. Living alone is freedom, but it is not exactly a day spent in a theme park. There are many situations where melancholy and self-pity will gnaw at your heart as termites do to the pillars of your home.
Particularly trying is eating alone, or doing the dishes or sitting alone in your living room at night can drive less-resolute people nuts. Even now, after so many years of living alone, these things still prick my soul once in a while.
Be tough and brush them aside. These negative thoughts do nothing but undermine your health and sense of well-being.
4. Always keep on the side of safety
With failing vision and frail balance, you can be prone to home accidents like falls, burning or scalding, and choking or other food-related incidents. Be very careful in everything you do and keep your home as accident-free as possible. Always be on the safe side.
If you live in a two-story house, sleep in a ground floor bedroom. Remove all clutter around your moving space and have it well-lit. Never leave electrical cords or any obstruction around your home unattended. Remove them at once.
Use gloves when handling hot objects, and use serving trays for newly-cooked foods. Turn off the gas stove or unplug the oven when work is done.
In storing food, use containers with big readable labels to prevent mix-ups. Labels should also indicate purchase dates to avoid ingesting spoiled stuff. Set your ref at 40 degrees Fahrenheit to make fruits and veggies last longer.
5. Eat well and drink lots of water
In the U.S., about one in two elderly is at risk of malnutrition and dehydration is one of the most common causes of emergency room admittance among people 65 and above.
The problem with these two health risks is that they are difficult to detect until it is way too late.
Malnutrition can cause health problems, diabetes, and heart disease while dehydration can result in heatstroke, seizures due to electrolytic loss, kidney failure or you can go into a coma.
6. Be active
Wake up before sunrise. Seeing the glimmers of a new day is refreshing and rejuvenating. You can feel your body jumping with joy at the caress of early-morning sunshine.
Right after or before breakfast (prefer after because it gives me the energy to do my regular exercises), hit the road for an early jog, play tennis or golf, or go to the gym.
Getting physical at the start of the day primes you up for the other tasks up ahead and raises your appetite for a mid-day snack which is necessary for people your age.
7. Go out and have fun
Keep certain days of the week to mingle with friends. An hour or so in a coffee is an excellent respite from the familiar scene at home.
If you are up to it, take a long drive or a vacation. Seeing unfamiliar surroundings, meeting new people, eating a different variety of foods can make you feel alive, excited. And the stored memories from trips will draw a smile across your face when clouds of loneliness and despair start creeping in.
Betty Friedan said, “Aging is not ‘lost youth’ but a new stage of opportunity and strength.”
And aging in place is the best venue to find both.
If you like this article, please share or subscribe to my mailing list.
Image: Senior Money Saver
~oOo~
